Country Trip
I had a country trip planned in which I was to visit some rural pharmacies and I was a bit nervous as
I’d just had a pretty disastrous time trying to find my way around Midland earlier on in the week so I made sure I found my GTS which wasn’t very helpful as it didn’t have the street I needed as I hadn’t yet gotten my son to download latest maps and neither did my street directory and there was no way I was going to try and follow that random blue dot on my Iphone map that had a total mind of it’s own. So I called my friend in the country pharmacy and told him of my stress and my hopeless sense of direction and he told me not to panic and to just call him when I reach this particular sign and he’ll talk me through it, (I also wasn’t keen to try that again as a result of my inability to follow instructions and dyslexia and then he said he would just come and get me. So I felt quite confident that I should be fine at least reaching my destination.
I wasn’t exactly that fantastic at what I was supposed to be doing but felt that it would be helpful if I at least looked the part so I wore my white business suit; jacket and pants and high heels. And off I set. So far so good; managed to detect a policeman with a hand held speed camera just in time to slow down to speed limit and cope with no radio in the country as I had plenty of cds. That was until I reached the sign that named the town and had an arrow pointing to street on the left. So I turned into it but then it looked like it I was driving into the middle of the bush. Mmm this didn’t quite look right and I thought I had better check before I went any further. So I pulled out my phone and dialled my friends number. Crikey, blimey I didn’t count on no reception. Now I was stuffed. So I stepped out of the car and waved my phone around trying to pick up some telephonic waves. I drove back up to the main road thinking I would have better luck there but it made no difference. So I drove back into the bush and looked for a tall tree to climb.
Luckily I was quite a proficient tree climber in my younger years, but unluckily they didn’t seem to build trees the way they used to and there didn’t seem to be any that would be able to cope with my weight. Surely I hadn’t put on that much weight. Gee I couldn’t even find a suitable tree stump. Mmm I had to be innovative and didn’t have a lot to work with. My only option was to climb onto the roof of my car. So I climbed up and sat on top but still no luck. So I climbed down. But what I hadn’t noticed was that my car was incredibly filthy. I had actually been waiting to go to a car wash with a friend of mine who had proved to be quite helpful last time we went to one together but the opportunity hadn’t arisen. It also seemed silly to wash one’s car before a drive to the country. So yes you guessed it when I looked down my white suit was now also filthy. The good news was at least my car didn’t look as bad. But I so did not look professional any more and was really not in any state to visit anyone. It looked like I had been crawling through the black dirt on my hands and knees. And normally I was so well prepared with a total change of clothes and extra coats and all but this time I only seemed to have an assortment of spare footwear. I had flat boots if my high ones got too uncomfortable, slippers in case I went somewhere that I needed to remove my footwear, sport shoes in case I felt like going for a jog, (definately not right now), my sneakers with attached roller blades in case I felt like potentially killing myself, (a possibility at the moment) but not even a jacket.
Even my hands were dirty and because I’d traded my handbag for a sophisticated brief case I didn’t even have a tissue or my antibacterial wash. This was unbelievable. I headed back to the main road and now my priority was to find a drycleaner and it needed to be one that did spot cleaning, preferably while I was still wearing my suit as I didn’t have a change of clothes. I also couldn’t even really take my jacket off as I thought that as it was quite coolish, it would be too cold to need to take my jacket off and consequently had gone braless, I definately had to give up that comfort in life. I kept checking my phone for reception and still no luck. Finally I reached what seemed like a little town with an assortment of shops, and decided that it would probably be easier to buy a new outfit, only they didn’t have any clothing shops, cripes how did they survive especially as they also didn’t seem to have a drycleaners either. I stood on the side of the road and noticed that I finally had reception, but as I looked up across the road was the Pharmacy I had been trying to find and there was my friend running across from his grand openings sausage sizzle to greet me. Filthy and unprofessional, he took one look at me smiled and shook his head not surprised.
